She takes this all in, smiles and says, “You have these movies here on DVD?”

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, I do.”

“If it weren’t for all the shit going on, I’d love to watch them. You use a lotta Cred?”

“Hell, yeah. These aren’t typical porn films, you understand, not even close. They’re lesbian action films. I’ve invented, uh, my own genre, and it ain’t the least bit sleazy. It’s sorta inspired by martial arts films crossed with Russ Meyer. The director of the big-tit flicks? Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! was definitely an inspiration. You ever hear of it?”

“I have it on VHS, I’ve seen it a hundred times. Tura Satana is my idol.”

I’m stupefied. Am I dreaming this girl? Why hasn’t she heard of me? Tura’s her idol and she hasn’t heard of me? I’ve gotten a fair amount of mainstream media coverage. What if I’m actually going insane and she didn’t really say that, I just think I heard it?

(Russ Meyer autograph acquired at a Las Vegas CES back in the day)